To Work or Not To Work... That is the Question!

This is by no means an easy decision!  As my 12 weeks of maternity leave were dwindling away anxiety started to kick in for me because I was grappling with a difficult decision.  Do I go back to work knowing that we would continue our comfortable lifestyle and be able to provide our baby with anything he, or rather we wanted, or do I stay home and provide the best care possible to him each and every day?   I went back and forth with this, while my husband was resolute on me becoming a stay at home mommy.  I definitely would have gone back to work (at least in a part time capacity) if either grandmas would have been able to watch Isaac, but alas, that was not the case.  Therefore, we had to make a decision on what would be the overall best for Isaac.  

I had to let go of my pride and put my family at the top of my list.  I would think, Omg I went to a fairly good university to become a stay at home mom?  And what will everyone think about me?  Am I a failure/loser?  I prayed about this constantly and God kept telling me that at this point in our lives I was to stay home with our son.  I kept trying to fight it and take control, but He truly knows what is best.  I also had to tell myself who cares what people think.  Do they pay your bills?  Heck naw! I don’t know if this is part of me growing older, but I just don’t care anymore about other’s opinions.  Life is too short to worry about that!

I must say that I am soo happy that I decided to become a stay at home mommy for the time being, even though it is a lot of work and at times waay more stressful than working!  This is probably one of the happiest and most satisfying times for us.  And although we definitely don’t have the funds we did with a two family income, God has been providing in all the ways we could ask for!  This is certainly a blessing and we do not take it for granted in any way.   Every now and then I’ll ask my hubby if he wishes I were back at work and he always responds with, Heck no, you’re much happier now and I love coming home to a happy and well taken care of family, what more can I ask for?  Hearing this from him really gives me that boost I need on those days I get down on myself because no matter what I do, I want to make sure I’m doing a darn good job at it!

After a few living/lifestyle adjustments (clipping coupons, yes maybe one day Issac will imitate honey boo boo child and say, “My mama nickname is Coupon Queen!”; monitoring our spending; hitting up the farmer’s market; cooking for most meals; limiting the vacays; finding free or cheap events to attend, etc…) we have been able to tweak things in order to provide for our family.  Sure, we are no longer able to go on our annual Sandals vacay or impromptu shopping sprees, but we know this is temporary and we will appreciate it much more once we are able to do it again.  In the meantime, we continue to look at the positive aspect in every challenge and work on being the best parents possible!

By no means am I knocking parents who choose to place their child in daycare or whatever means to get back to work.  We as parents must make whatever decision on what is best for our family and it is no one’s place to judge that.  Priorities are different for everyone, so figure yours out and make it happen!  And either way, get a great support system around you because I can testify that great friends and family really make a difference! (I will brag about this, God has placed the best people in our lives and we are always in awe of this!) 

Whether you decide to stay at home or go back to work be at peace knowing you are doing what is best for your baby given your current circumstance.  Also, if something isn’t working, don’t feel trapped, make whatever changes to ensure happy living for your family!