Tonight my hubby and I went on a date. Normally, we would have one of the
grandparents babysit the babies, but tonight we tried something new and loved
it! Our church has a monthly program for
members called Parents Night Out and it allows parents to drop their kids off
for a few hours to have some alone time to run errands, go on date, etc. I really like this because the kids get to
play with other kids from our church that are around the same age and most
importantly, we trust the cute little grandmas that watch our babies (they are
also Sunday school teachers). It also only costs $10 for them to watch both
of our boys for 3.5 hours, score! We
will definitely utilize this every month!
I think it is so important for parents to have alone time
with one another because sometimes it can become only about the kids. Do not get me wrong, our kids are our world,
but nurturing our relationship with one another is equally as important in my
book. Even when we are unable to go out
on a conventional date, my love and I will have, cute home dates once we put
the boys to sleep. Some cute ideas we’ve
done are: ordered takeout and had a
picnic on the floor with one another, candlelit dinner, dinner (cooked by
hubby) and a movie, game night, drinks and dessert or just plain ole snuggle
time while watching a movie. For me, it
is about spending quality time with one another and keeping the love alive. The way we laugh with one another, have deep
conversations and simply enjoy one another’s company speaks directly to my love
language of quality time. If you have
not figured out your love language and your partner’s, check it out here, http://www.5lovelanguages.com/. It really is quite interesting and helps you identify your primary love language.
You also feel rejuvenated and able to better parent after
having some alone time with one another.
I can definitely tell you from experience that kids notice any
negativity, which is why we really strive to maintain a positive
household. We are not perfect by any
means, but we are continuously learning and growing every day. For instance, Jon and I were recently snippy at one another
because we were on edge from sleep deprivation (our kids hate sleep). I got on to him for never closing the kitchen
cabinets or doors when he opens them.
Instead of asking him nicely for the 100th time to close the
cabinets and pantry door, I went off. He
snapped back with a snarky response and boom, an argument ignited. Isaac was sitting at his table looking at a
book and while we were whisper yelling at one another (you know, trying to be
all quiet while firing snippy things at one another), I could catch his
glimpses at us and then he asked, “Mama are you happy?” “Daddy are you happy?” That immediately diffused the situation because
we realized that we have little ears listening to us at all times and we want
to be positive role models for him in every sense. We then continued having a discussion about
the situation, but with a gentler tone and came to a resolution with Isaac
witnessing all of it. We could have
squashed the argument and said we will talk more about this later, but we
wanted him to see that yes, people who love one another can disagree and get
upset, but they can also talk civilly to one another about it and work on a
suitable resolve.
Having kids does not mean you turn into an “old married
couple.” You continue dating and get creative
if obstacles threaten to thwart your alone time with one another. Be that relationship that your kids will
want to have with someone when they are older.
Lead by example because little eyes and ears are always taking things
in.
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